Dear Mom and Dad,
Just checking, do you want Grandchildren via your third child? Because it kind of seems like you don't.
Love,
Your wonderfully eligible daughter
Back in the day when I was living at home, checking in with my parents was an absolute must if I was out later than say --- 5 pm. It was the law (and rightfully so) to let my parents know where I was at all times. If I mistakenly didn't contact them soon enough I would get the ever scary text: "WHERE ARE YOU!?" I instantly knew I needed to contact them ASAP or fear for my life.
What does this have to do with me being single? I now have an immediate reject button when it comes to being interested in a guy.
It's easy really. If you want to be my FRIEND--shoot my a text. If you want to shoot your chances with me in the foot--send me a text. Perhaps it seems odd, but my parents have instilled a hate-hate relationship with texting. You do it as a necessity. Not as a way to woe me. If you don't like me enough to want to hear my voice, you probably don't like me enough for me to even think about being interested in you. Plain and simple.
Perhaps the letter should read:
Dear Mom and Dad,
Thanks for making it really easy to decide whether or a not a guy is worth practicing my new last name on my note book in my spare time.
Love,
Your ever grateful, albeit ever single daughter
We wanted grandchildren from our third eldest.....yesterday! Sorry for instilling the malicious text-phobia! -TextDad
ReplyDeleteI feel the same way, Emily. Texting a lady is pretty much the grown man's equivalent to a kid sending his friend across the playground to see if a girl likes him. No risk of embarrassment (just in case she says no), but the babe is still left thinking, "Oh, so I'm not even worth it for him to go out of his way to talk to me?"
ReplyDeleteGrandchildren? We are ready when the right gentleman is deserving! Hey, WHERE ARE YOU now? xox Mom
ReplyDeleteIm trying to take this on as well - lets start a campaign to bring back phone calls !!!
ReplyDeleteDear Emily,
ReplyDeleteI just discovered your blog through a long and convoluted friend ---> blog ---> other blog process that I won't explain, and just want to say: thank you. I literally laughed out loud about three times in the space of 7 minutes of reading, which kind of made my day. I look forward to reading more.